Sunday, June 8, 2008

Happiness Vs. Journalling

I've never been one of those people who can "journal." Years ago in the teen diary stage I'd always feel guilty if I skipped days, then weeks, then months. How could you continue a diary if you missed so much time? Later as an adult, as a writer, I'd read how I should be journalling every day, clearing my mind, doing "morning pages" or just dumping whatever (crap) is in my brain. I could never do that. It sounded so whiney. If I write, if I put something on paper that is "permanent" that someone else might eventually pick up and read, I don't want it to be so self-serving. Okay, so I have issues.

But I just had an idea about keeping a "happiness" journal. Just trying to write every day (okay, so whenever I get around to it--no guilt!). Any way, writing BRIEFLY about something that makes me happy or made me happy that day.

Maybe I'll post those here every now and then too.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Laughter

I can't underestimate the importance of laughter! There are just some things that amuse me now and I am embracing them. TV shows: "Who's Line is it Anyway?" "Two and a Half Men," "Big Bang Theory," "Kathy Griffith," "Flipping Out," just crack me up. The kids' sense of humor, and Katlyn's "full body" hugs. Matthew thinks its too "Arkansas" to hug me. Which cracks me up too. My funny little Lhaso Apso, Maggie, loves me and is the goofiest little thing. I say all the time that she alone can get me through the depths of my MS. Listening to anything by Harry Nilsson--a blast to the past--brings a smile to my face and a song on my lips as I walk or workout.

And my Dr. wrote me a "prescription" that says "No housework FOREVER!" Which my son framed and put up in the kitchen. Now I doubt it will inspire anyone in this house to do chores in lieu of me, but it makes me laugh out loud everytime I look at it!

That and antidepressants and I have it made.

Outtting Myself

The joke in my house was that I had MS before I was diagnosed. It stood for (Boss's first name starting with an M) Syndrome. I couldn't deal with my second, and real MS until I got rid of the first MS. And today was my first day with her GONE!

So I outed myself to the remaining department members. I must say I was underwhelmed with their concern. Both knew other people with MS and pooh poohed my diagnosis with a kind of "Oh you'll be fine" kind of attitude. Which is another reason I waited before I outted myself to everyone. I needed to grieve and really wallow in the seriousness of the diagnosis before I could hope for the best.

People mean well, but boy can they come across as insensitive!